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I celebrate it now.” * Some names have been changed for privacy.

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“Its good to have somebody as a sounding board in a situation like this,” he says.

“Its a lot easier to tell someone I have MS as a side note in a conversation than to sit down and have a formal discussion focused solely on MS.” However, even a casual, well-prepared speech doesnt always meet with success.

“One guy just clammed up and didnt want to say anything or go anywhere because, in his eyes, I might get hurt,” Allison* says.

That way, if your secret does make a big difference, you wont have wasted too much of their time—or yours.

“Of course it can be painful, but if thats the case, its better to know before you get too involved,” Sussman says.

“Its complicated if you withhold it and they find out too late.